Zombie weekend, and another beginning.

Hmmph, it has been long since I last came back to you dear bloggie. That sounds gay, but lol. Where'd I last stopped? Friday? I woke up the next morning on Saturday, and it was shitty. I barely slept 4 hours. I don't even know why. The insomniac crisis has striked again. Damn. But oh well, I did spend half the day gaming, trying out non-sensical stuff, just for the fun of it. Then at night, Jimmy called. My bloody phone gave up on me halfway, but anyway, we did manage to reach Poppy that night. Of course, we were, freaking late. I think we reached the place at like 1.20 am. Damn. Opened a bottle, and guess who we have there with us? Krazy! Er, rather, Pei Li. This is the first time we ever clubbed with her, and hmmmph, Adrian himself was pretty surprised about it. Hee. Well, this is something everyone should learn. Never believe a girl, when she says that she cannot dance. Well, Pei Li is one hell of a dancer, and of course, we all had fun, especially Kyle. I would spare the details. :P

Rawrrr... At the same time, I met alot of people in Poppy and Passion that night. Kelly, you are one pretty girl. I do really think that you're a beatiful girl, with a nice personality, but of course, you're sharp at words, and you always make me think twice before I try to say something that may be sensitive. I maybe extra cautious, but I don't wanna risk my friendship. Then there was Kenneth, Redd and my classmates. Heh. Typical of Redd, but I am quite surprised to meet them there. But of course, its good.

We had Boon sent back to his car in Silva, and then, we came back to Sri Petaling. Errrr, okay, we all screwed up. Went to Point Ex, and we sat there till the next morning. Of course, my housemate called, cos I was supposed to move that morning. We did rush home, and my friends helped me move. Thanks alot for you people's help and efforts, Kyle, Alex and Pei Li. I do really appreciate them. When we're done, everyone went home, and came out straight away. Gawd, for the very first time, I tried Cendol in KL, and guess what. It tastes freaking good. The cendol infront of IMU, heh. I think I'm hooked to it. Then we were back in Point Ex, omfg.

But then, I had a call from a girl. She was crying over the phone, and she asked if I wanna drink with her. I was pretty surprised. This is the first time she has done such thing. Well, of course, I said okay. Pretty concerned about her. Then, she told me that she got into an accident. High speed accident, and she told me that her car landed on the divider. When I met her infront of vista, tears were streaming down her cheeks, and she's pretty upset and disappointed about things. But oh well, after a bottle of beer, she seems to be pretty stable and fine.

I went to play pool with friends on Monday, and all of a sudden I got myself a message that's asking me for a drink. Well, it was her. But I was in Subang, and I couldn't come back that quick, so she went with someone else, and I wonder who. We did finish the games, picked up Jo, and I think Jo was pretty mad at me for not calling her to game. Heh. Sorry girl. Tuesday was just another typical day at the cyber. =.=

Wednesday! Today is an unexpected day. :P Well I know that we're gonna have dinner with Amy Kok and the rest, as they're celebrating her birthday for her. Well, I didn't know Jing was invited, and vice versa. We had Japanese food at the Gardens, at some Japanese restaurant which I don't even remember what its name is. Er, I'm bad at names. Can't help :P. Then they went shopping, which I can't really say I'm interested in, but of course, I do enjoy looking at those stuff. And guess what, they even use bamboo powder to smoothen your skin. Surprised? lol. I think I should start walking around the mall more often. And of course, the ladies, heh, itchy clubbers. They were planning on going Maison, and of course, we did.

A lot of things happened in the club tonight, but whatever that happens should stay in the club. Jing, thank you alot... For everything that you've done for me, for us, and for yourself. I do really feel blessed to have you around, and I really appreciate all those small little things. And of course, the wallet you bought. Its lovely. Thank you darling. There is something that has been pondering in my head for quite some time, but I never find the right time to ask you about it. I mean, I had lots of opportunity to do that, but I wasn't ready for the risk. Lemme know when you're ready to listen to it. =/

Well, we'll see what happens the next few days. Good Night.

Beautiful yet, not so beautiful.

It hasn't been a good week, or at least that what I was thinking for the first few days into the week. First, I lost my wallet, and EVERYTHING IN IT. EVERY SINGLE THING. IC, license, student ID, loads of cash, and all my cards. I had my IC fixed on Wednesday I think, and now, I've got a temporary one, lol. Together with my license. I've tried going to the bank, but the bank staff wouldn't allow me to get a new ATM card, so they argued. I don't have enough personal documents to support my applications. Damn. =.=

Then, I went to Coco on Thursday, to catch a glimpse of Pussy Cat Dolls, PCD. Guess what? She's O M F G. N I C O L E S C H E R Z I N G E R is damn freaking hot. =.= Well, of course, its for publisiti and such, damn, they only appeared for like 10 mins? Lol. But who cares? We've got free entrance, with free-flow of liqour. :P The night wasn't that good after all, but yeah, I've had fun, and a bit of satisfaction.

I was in Zouk tonight. I mean, I've got a not-so-nice-impression of Zouk even before I came here. Surprisingly, the bouncers let me in. Wow, yes, I'm under 21, but they must have been pretty impressed with that piece of junk I showed them, my temporary IC, and license. Gawd, try flashing something the size of half an A4 Paper. =.= Zouk, doesn't live up to my expectation. Seriously. The crowd was filled with middle-eastern souls, and Malay kids. Those middle-eastern people, I don't know how to say it, but they seem not to see chiques before. =/ They get all pretty fired up and such when they see some girls on the dance floor, and that sucked. Seriously.

Jing, I know you've been trying to stay sober tonight, but that ain't gonna work :P I know you, maybe not well enough to presume your next move, but I'm sure you would get pretty tipsy tonight. You don't drink much anyway :P . You were more sober and awake tonight, compared to last Saturday in Poppy. Of course, your smile, and those dances, did really capture my heart. But then, I'm still doubting, and the doubt, haven't been cleared. There are things which I don't really understand, but I guess it wouldn't be appropriate to ask you. Hmmph, I wonder if I should just leave it to myself to have those questions answered, or are you gonna ask me about it? I don't know. All I know is that, I should be ready to answer myself by then. Huh. I wonder if that particular day, is coming soon.

Well, Kelly, you've changed a lot I think, since the first time we've met here in KL. Hmmph, either that or, I didn't get to know you properly the first time. Heh.... I remembered you being taller, despite the fact that you argued about it with me. But you seem to be different now. :P You told me that you don't dance, but you seem to be pretty good tonight. Well, I did have a good time with you ladies tonight, and I do hope to get my date claims soon. I'm pretty sure that you'll be surprised if you happen to find out that I actually do blog, but heh, I'll leave things to flow their way.

Darn, I've gotta move my house tomoro =.= There are lots and lots and lots of things to move, and I hope that things will go smoothly. Hopefully everything'll be allright, and hopefully some people are gonna turn up to help me with this. Well, I'm pretty sleepy of course, so I guess this is good night. =) Sleep tight ladies and all the souls in the world. :P

Poppy ! And hmmph, I wonder.

Well, I've been skipping the past few days. Hmmph, or I would rather say, yesterday? Nothing much has happened recently, except for a few happening friendly matches and of course, the sms'es. Somehow, I've learned bit by bit, that she's someone different, pretty different. Like I usually would say, everyone's unique, and everyone's good at something. Screwing your studies, blundering your papers... They're normal stuff. Everybody does that, of course, in your mind, there are those people who's never missed an A, and there are lots of people who passed with flying colours. What can I say? Life's unfair? Nah, those people, are idiots. Not that I wanna prejudice against the "so-called-smarter class" of people, but really, these people, has no life. Well not all of course, just in case any of you who read this felt guilty as charged... But I'm sure, you would bring forward your point in your argument. Right or wrong, what I mention here may not be true, or it may be true to a certain extent, but who knows except you, yourself. Who else can be cleared about yourself other than you? Of course, except Him.

Tonight, I was quite surprised myself. Loads of surprise. Firstly, her. Hmmph, to compliment her, she looks good, better than her in pictures :p. There's something to that smile, not to be quoted from batman. I don't know what to say about it anymore. Its..... Special. She's chirpy as usual, but of course, she's different from the first time I saw her after that night. Heh, maybe I haven't been paying attention enough in the car, or either, I was carried away by the little fear that chilled through my spine, or rather, nerves. Well, to start with, I'm supposed to "get punished" with drinks. But then, hmmmph, she dropped before I realised. Well, 3 glasses dear. If you ever wondered how much you drank tonight. Even Kenneth was quite surprised. Of course, its the first time we clubbed... She was pretty energitic, she danced throughout the night, and I must say I'm impressed by the stamina. Whatever happens in the club, stays in the club. Hush dan, hush. But, its the smile. I can't deny that. I think I'm starting to sound like Joker. =.=

Right, we all did the same thing again. I don't think she'll realise, but lol, we left her in the car for supper. It happened once, and it seems like history repeated itself tonight. You would probably kill me for this but, heh. I don't know :p. It's been a tiring night trying to keep up with her, catch up with friends, picking up the tune, flowing with the music. I'd hope things would carry on for the better, or rather, move forward? I don't know what are the proper words to describe what I meant, but well, I think I should understand. Good night.

Wassup Barcelonaaa!

Well, it's been quite some time since I last clubbed with Kenneth and the rest. Hmmph, nothing much has happened recently, except that today, I discovered that.... IMU cup's dota is gonna be a tough event. And I'm still wondering if I should play. Damn... If I would, then how is it that my juniors are gonna show their true colours? Lawl, maybe they won't. I thought. I would probably be still thinking that.... They might not have enough experience to fight Kyle, or even Ken and the rest. Its gonna be tough for them to handle. But... Should I play? Or Shoulnd't I? I don't know... The recent ICCG event, has taught me alot, but, it might not be enough. Who knows? Well, I shall leave it up to You to decide, and lead me on.

Slepy and tipsy as I am, I was in barcelona tonight, together with Kyle, Joel and Kenneth. It has been quite messy a night, with Joel and Kyle losing themselves at the dance floor. And there was this friend of Kenneth, which was quite hard to handle. Hmmph, he's not a girl, but he drinks alot, and seldom.... Pretty seldom, we beat him to it =/. Well, I did go to the dance floor, but Barcelona, is still Barcelona. For those who've been there, I'm sure you know what I mean.

Rather, I was messaging this girl. Hmmph, I was tipsy, I think, but I'm sure that I was sober or rather, concious enough to be replying her. Like I've mentioned in my message, alcohol would've taken quite a toll on me, but it would make me think less, rather than considering my risks. If you would read this, I think you'll know what I mean. But well, I do mean what I've said in those messages, regardlesss of whether I'm sober, or concious enough.

Saturday ! I just can't wait for that day to come, and I"m really looking forward to it. Hopefully everything will turn out good. I shall go to bed soon, as my eyes are... Already half? Good night.

ICCG and When things don't come off.

Hmmph, lots of stuff have been happening lately, that I didn't really have the time to blog. First there was clubbing on thursday night, which we practically did nothing but drink, dance and stone. lol. VSOP is strong. Only one bottle that night, and the 4 of us were suffering. 2 of us were drunk. But well, it was a good night. We all had fun, and of course, that's what we're there for.

Then, I had to do presentation for my research proposal on friday. Damn, it was one hell. I don't really know what happened during the presentation, but for once, I think I presented quite well. Well, the sense of humour. I guess.. Heh. But then, I practically couldn't answer any of the questions that were forwarded to me. Damn, what's with IMU lecturers... They think like 300 miles ahead. But then, getting fired... I think everyone's gonna be numb with it after a few times of such bombardments.

Tonight... Arrrr. Sad Saturday. HMMMPH... ICCG rocks. We played like 5 matches and gawd, I was playing Lich for 5 games. Damn. The first few games were easy, we cruised thru and such, bullying our opponents. BUt the last game, the finals against DNA.sk, was ugly lol. We got wrapped and sent home like hot nasi lemaks. Darn, who cares. I won 160 bucks. lol.

And then I settled down on my bed, hugged my laptop, and started talking to this girl. Damn, sometimes, I really think, I have all my attention drawn to her. She's nice to talk to, like she claims, sweet, chirpy, cheerful, playful, naughty. I don't know how accurate these adjectives are, but angelic is definitely inaccurate. :p. I know you would read this someday, and grin over this. Then, she told me about her princinples, which in the beginning got me a little shocked, but I think I can accept what she thinks, even though I still think that it isn't really that decent, but oh well, this argument is never gonna end.

I know that she's really looking forward to this coming Saturday's visit to poppy. So am I. BUt hmmph, after what she's told me, I do worry a little. She tells me that she trusts me, and I'm glad that she does. Well I guess I've gotta thank Steph for all those good testimonials she's given me. :p I wonder what's gonna happen next? Well, the future is not to be predicted, but Lord, I leave everything in your hands, and I hope that you'll lead me on. Nitez.

Of Girls, hurt and emoness.

Well, I fetched this girl home the other day. She was a cool girl. She talks alot, and I think I kinda like her personality and attitude. Hmmph, I think I didn't judge her wrong, she seems like the girl I thought she would be, but a little more. This wonderful, chirpy girl has somewhat captured my heart in some way, that I couldn't resist messaging her right after I dropped her to pick up her car. Her name was Yi Jing. Well, its never wrong to make another good friend, and like she said, we clicked well together like bffs. Ah, a new term that I've learned recently lol. Best Friends Forever. Heh. She's a nice girl, and I really look forward to clubbing with her. I wonder what she'll be like. She looks pretty playful to me, and I hope I'm not being proven wrong.

Quite alot of stuff happened this weekend. I clubbed on saturday night at cocobanana with the usual bunch again. Haha, for the first time, this club, is infested with 'bak kut teh' and 'seafood'. My gawd. First there's this bunch of idiots who're making a fools of themselves.

You know, Veen, I really think its about time for you to settle down and appreciate him. Be less playful. Eventhough I think that you wouldn't listen to this or anything like it but... I don't know. Hmmph. Well its really up to you to decide your own life. I saw your pictures with him and your vacation. Sometimes I think, that I'm neutral with you, that I don't have feelings anymore, but things are tough to get away with after being together for so long. I might seem normal infront of you, but sometimes, I do get jealous and abit hurt looking at your pictures. But of course, I know I have to stay strong and pull myself through this. Anyway, I do hope that you both will work things out, and all the best. You may not read this, you may. Who knows?

Then today I went out with Steph and Amy. Ahhh... LoL, nowhere weird, just grocery shopping and dinner. I found out that, this clubbing queen, is also junk food queen. I wonder how she keeps a body of that shape with the amount of chocs, sweets and junks. Haha, but then, listening to her talk about the other two guys that they met in clubs last friday, I now think that... Guys at this age are pretty immatured. Hmmph. Chinese school guys, english school guys, they differ in thoughts, maturity and even their perceptions. It doesn't only apply to guys, even girls. Its obvious, on how to differentiate a chinese educated person from an english educated soul. Back to Amy, she was complaining about these two guys who were annoying here, as they talk a little too much. Hmmmph, I do know about such things, even though this is the first time I see people who talk too much, and they don't even think before they talk.

I got quite taken aback, rather than pissed off when these guys said to me: Its not that I don't trust you, its just that these are normal procedures. Hello babies? What are you talking about? Normal procedures? You don't even know who am I, and they barely even know you. Well, I guess I can keep my patience for such things.

Pretty tired lately. Stressed up with statistics... Proposal, Presentation. What else are they gonna throw to us? I wonder. Screw B-pharm. Screwww B-pharm but oh well, I'm in sem 7, and there's only a year left. Wish me all the best.

A routine day, Ladies night

Hmmphhh... I woke up today, stoninggg... Stone baby stone. Stoningly and astonishingly, I managed to wake myself up, struggled off my bed because of a promise I've made yesterday. Oh well, promises are promises, and they're not meant to be broken, I think, or at least, I've changed my mind since then. Don't make a promise, and don't give someone your words, if you cannot make it. Damn, this Malaysian 'tidak apa' attitude has really taken quite a toll off me and the youths today. I don't know about people, but I do feel bad, when I give someone my words and I'm unable to meet them.

Eh, emo night. Here I am sitting alone drinking beer, flashing back on what that has just happened. A good game with friends while I suddenly get this call, saying that friends couldn't start another's car. Ah, the second call came, and I learned that the driver was drunk, but I didn't know who she was. Well, I gave someone my word that I would go to her rescue, errr, that's the way she put it, so I went.

We waited and waited and waited, patiently, for her friends to drive her car out, but it doesn't seem to arrive. They came back, complaining about the immobilizer system in Civic. Ah, I didn't know its that complicated either. I knew it was shitty but, lol. So I had to fetch her home. She curled up at the back seat in the car, together with Steph who was struggling to get her to lie down properly. Ah, she wouldn't lol. She kept slipping. And then Steph mentioned that she looked cute and sweet when she's sleeping. I wonder what she looks like. I totally missed out on it, but oh well, no bad intentions though. Heh.

We went yumcha'ing with Amy and the rest of the gang. Damn, chinese educated guys. They are sooo... I don't know how to describe it. Well, better say nothing if you can't say anything nice. They were friendly, but lol. We both can see that Amy's getting abit mad and irritated with them. Ladies, ladies. Ah, and yes, my mandarin improved. Kononnya. LOL. Thanks for the compliment darling. And, if you would read this someday, I miss clubbing with you ladies lol.

Hmmph, so we had to send her home. She practically threw herself at the first thing she can find. Me. I was abit surprised, but oh well... We got her off the car, and I carried her to the elevator. It has been quite some time since I last carried someone. She isn't that heavy, but my leg hurts. I had a cut at the bottom of foot. Err, again, with no bad intention or whatsoever, she's nice to hug. We had to carry her along, till she reached her home. Her room was abit messy but oh well... Haha... And the finally threw herself on her bed. Good night girl. I don't think she'll remember anything tomorrow.

Then I came back, talking to Veen. Ah, as usual lol. She, trying to prove herself as the not-so-good-girl to me. Heh, you're a naughty girl I know. But, its about time for you to settle down if you take your relationship seriously. But well, I enjoy talking to you, alot. All your nonsense and craps, makes you interesting. Too bad, what's over is over. I do kinda like my life now. Single, not-quite-available, or rather I don't really wanna get attached. Errr, I was just saying. If the right one comes, I think I'll go for it too. There have been a few ladies that I am quite fond of, but well, like I said, I don't really wanna go for it. If you would believe me. Heh.

I should go continue my emoness, drowning my sorrows with the classic bottle of carls, I don't really remember when I bought it. LoL. Nite ladies, morning gents.

Tipsiness and Lots of Fun

I haven't been writing much lately. Errr, there haven't been much to write. But tonight, I went clubbing agian, with TCC and the rest, of course, Kenneth was there. Both of them were drunk, but there was this girl. Her nick was Cy, same initial as mine. She's friendly, interesting and such, but she knows her limits too well. She's kinda like a good girl, but I'm interested to know her more. Oh well, practically, I just wanna make some friends and know everyone better.

Shit I'm freaking tipsy when I'm typing this. Errr, I just realised, I practically attended none of the classes at all this semester. Damn, what's going on man dan... Ah well, the meeting today with our perceptors went smoothly, even though we almost ran outta patience waiting for them. Oh well, we've gotta understand anyway, they're busy. Now that I know, my English sucks, no matter how many of you think that its at least okay. Damn proposal. It took me like half the night till morning to work on it and get it done. Oh well, at least its okay now. Pray for me and hope that I'll get a result that is good enough to pull my CGPA up. I think. I hope, I pray.


My new phone.... =.=. Its hard to use.. I think, or rather, I'm not used to it. I hope that the additional functions will become useful soon. Nitez.

A new baby, and another great start.

What's over is over. I kept telling myself. My mum told me the same thing too, over and over agian. Well, I think its about time to really pick up the bits of myself that was left over, and move on forward. Even though we still keep in touch and we're in a good relationship, things should move on. You're now attached. Things should change, and nothing remains the same as last time.

And yes, the long wait for the new baby... Has finally ended. The PDA arrived today, after a long wait at the mamak, in the cyber, in McD, and back to mamak again. I wonder what the guy who's helping me to get the phone did, but oh well, I did have quite a good time testing my patience, talking nonsense to Kenneth. I mean, we do actually share alot of stuff, guys stuff, which we seldom talk to girls about. And of course, guys are guys, business talk. =.= We both have this idea, that liqour buffet is gonna be a bang. I wonder, all those plans... Are they gonna work someday? lol. I've yet to check the phone out... I'm eager to. :p I shall skip all the unnecessary details.

I heard Kelly's back in KL. Can't wait to see her, and of course, claim my date. I should go to bed. Haven't been sleeping much and I've been skipping a little too many classes. Damn work. Proposal is really taking quite a toll on everyone. Nitez.

Emoness and Chillingz

It haven't been a good day, eventhough the night drinking session was good. Veen, I don't really know how you get yourself into such trouble. You called me today, and in your sobbing voice you tell me your concerns. What can I do for you, really? Who am I in this life of yours. I know, as a friend, I've always tried my best to help and advise you, but, this is abit different from other situations. Its about you and your relationship. If you really think that he's not the one for you, in my little heart says, leave him and start all over again. But I really couldn't bear to tell you that straight forward, cos in my heart, I know you're trying your best to make this work. But yet, I really don't understand. Why bother forcing yourself into something that you wouldn't be happy of. You complained, that he's a good friend, but he's over-controlling and over-protective. He restricts you from your freedom, and who has the right to do so, when the Lord himself gives you the freedom to do anything you wanted? Freewill. remember? He's actually quite fucked up, but yet I don't think you're seeing it the way I'm looking at it. I really don't know what else to tell you Veen. You've been a dear to me, but yet I'm helpless when you need me.

Enough about the emoness. I went for a drink tonight, again, with Kenneth. There was only two of us, and urm, some friends. His friendster friends. Of course I did get to know them abit later on, and we talked and played games, but the most important thing is that, we talked about lots of stuff. About ladies, work, studies, friends, and I do realise that we're not quite different from each other, except some of our perspectives, and a little bit on the way we think. I really would appreciate a friend like you. And Redd, you have been guilty tonight. Charged with FFKness. Lawl.

I wouldn't be writing much tonight. Pretty sleepy, but Veen, I hope you'll pull yourself through this stuff soon. I'll try my best to be there for you whenever you need me, and if you really do need help, tell me. It may be a little too late the day you read this blog, and you may be surprised, but I'll tell you abit it someday later, I think, when I'm ready to show you. But I do know, that you'll call whenever you need me to be at your side, and you can count on me. It applies to everyone, not only you, cos I know, I would try my best to help anyone who's in trouble. I'm sure someone else will return the favour when I'm in trouble myself. God Bless.

Gents, lads and dates.

Arrr... Shit. I wrote everything but I forgot to save them, and now I've to write them over again. Oh well, I went clubbing again, yesterday night. Damn, Kenneth, you've slacked out dude. You've been drunk for two nights in a row lol. How can you let this happen? You were one of the most steady guy among us. But well, the night turned out to be good. Everyone had fun, and most of you were too tipsy to even walk in a straight line.

I went back home that night, late, errr, or I would rather say early? 4.30 am. I got home, took my shoes off, threw my socks and shirt into the laundry basket, and poof, a nice hot bath. But there's one problem. I couldn't sleep till my work is done. Damn elective reports. Oh well, I practically did nothing for them, except wasting my time in cyber-cafes, and of course, play some tournaments. It has been quite some time since we've won any tourneys. Things haven't been going on well, and with my current teammates, we haven't really been doing anything or have any training. I wonder how things are gonna turn out for SMM.

I came outta the bathroom, and I got straight to work. But I did talk to Veen too. She's been complaining to me about him, the other guy, or I would rather say, her so-called-boyfriend. Things between them haven't been going on well. I don't know why she tells nobody else but me, but this is abit odd you know. Telling your ex about your present. Heh. But its cool, I can take it. But there's something that I don't really understand. If you know that its not gonna work, why bother dragging. I personally think that you need more courage and determination in yourself, Veen.

You know, there are things that I don't really understand about guy, eventhough I'm one of those typical guys. We all would say that, younger guys are childish. It is really that bad, that older girls would usually try to avoid dating younger guys. I agree, they can be immatured, and sometimes, even annoying and irritating. But, talk about dating older guys. I am surprised myself, when I look at things that has happened between my girl-friends, and their partners. Is it really true, that guys turn possesive and insecured when they age? Or is it just that they're looking for something different in their partners? I don't really know, I'm not there yet.

Almost everyone tell me that trust is an important essence in a relationship. BUT, ask yourselves. How many of you practice what you're telling me? How many of you, really trust your partner enough? I wouldn't say that you should trust your partner in everything that she or he says or does, but you should trust them to a certain extent. I used to be someone who's curious and suspicious of my partner. I always wanted to find out what she's doing, where she's going or where she's at, who she's with, but, does it really matters? Personally I think, you should let your partner know your plans, so that he or she wouldn't be worried about you, or they know where to look for you if there's anything urgent. I really don't understand, how can guys and girls, think so primitively, or think so much, that they can even visualise things that wouldn't come across your mind. Some parents and partners can be so insecured, that they would assume that you're gonna cheat or lie to them anytime.

C'mon people, is this a sign of insecurity, immaturity, or is it just another plain malaysian attitude or way of thinking? I can't really give you an answer for this, but I PERSONALLY THINK, this is dumb. I believe that everyone knows their limit, to a certain extent. Some people might overdo things, but when they look back someday, I'm sure they will know.

When I saw you today Veen, you changed alot. We talked alot during lunch, and you complained about him alot. Sometimes, I do really feel the empathy for you. But oh well, I now think, that you are more matured in the way you think, but infront of me, I think, only to me, you're always that kiddo girl who wants attention. I really hope you'll be fine, and you'll get over this as soon as possible. I've changed alot too, I know. The relationship, breaking up period and there after, I've learned alot, and I've also learned to look at things from a different way, different perspectives. Howeverm, I still think that I'm quite indecisive and I think I don't have enough confidence. You've always said that I'm much more matured than alot of guys. I sorta like agree now, from what I've seen.

You know, sending you to Sentral today... I kinda felt awkward when you gave me that. Even though I was longing for it, and I've missed you, but... Still, it feels odd. Not that I didn't want it, or I didn't like it, I just don't know how to describe my feelings. You know, you sorta like... Made me fall for you again. Eventhough mum previously told me that I shouldn't get myself involved in things that have already passed, I'm still in a dilemma myself. I do hope that things will work out well in its ways for you, Veen. I'll pray for you too.

Well, I'm still quite excited to meet a friend who'll be back in KL by next week or so. I've got a date with her, for a lunch at a place that I've never been before. She's smart, charming, cool, and pretty deadly with her tongue. She bites with her words, if you're not careful. :P . Is that abit too much of credit for you, young lady? You know, you seem to be someone who knows alot about stuff, good at words, and its kinda challenging talking to you when you are filled with melancholy, sarcasm and cynicism. I'm really looking forward to meet you soon, and to know you better, cos you seem like a pretty interesting person to discover.

I should go to bed. Slept only 4 hours yesterday. Damn, clubbing again for tonight =). Well, we'll see how things take their path, and I hope everything will turn out for the better for all of us, especially you Veen.

Wassup? It's been quite a period.

Hello bloggie. It has been quite some time since I last blogged. A few days I guess. I first I thought it wasn't that happening, and nothing much has happened since the past few days... But when I looked back... Wow. I wouldn't say that I'm quite a happening guy. I would rather name myself after urrrr.. myself? Jo El used to equate me with entertainment, Dan = Entertainment. Awww... Too bad he's gone now, and I miss him too. He was a good housemate, a good friend.

Enough about old skool stories. On monday, I went to play squash with Mikee and the rest again. She was enthusiastic bright, but yet, something tells me that she's been keeping alot of secrets in her heart. They way she played cards by herself, and that thing she said to me, keeps me wondering all this while. What has happened in the past? Something bad? I don't know. She refuses to elaborate further, and I didn't want to ask. I guess sometimes its better to leave things the way it is. Oh well, we did break the record of 10 hits. Hah, that's how good our squash is. Laugh all you want. :p The only person who would be reading this and laugh, would be you, Amanda, I think. This blog is supposed to be kept for myself only, but well, guys are guys. They give in to girls. Sadly.

And then, my usual self. Being lazy and procastinative, I now think that I have a long list, or rather I would say, dozens of work to do. but oh well, I'm being myself. I was absent from class for 2 days, and Shin Yee keeps saying that she'll strangle me for all the time that I wasn't in class. And yet, she complains that she has to read miniature version of journals. She even measured how thick the journals are. lol. Whatever you can do when you're desperate I guess. :p Don't get angry at me for typing this, if you ever read this in the later days. Heh.

I went clubbing tonight. Errrrr, #%*@$@). So called clubbing. Euphoria, Ministry of Sound. A screwed up place. F**ked up man. The Malaysian version of this "high class" club sucks. I've always wondered, which idiot would line up to pay to enter the club. Its freaking expensive, and all the bouncers think that you can't afford it. Damn. I wonder how'd you live with a club like that, but yet, there were dozens, or I would say, more people than you'll ever see lining up to enter a haunted house, damn. They were sweating like pigs, as it was freaking hot in the corridor, and yet, Malaysians, with their kaypo attitude of curiosity, would endure this pain to enter a club. Omfg. They drive like nuts. Probably this is where their patience were channeled to. Too bad, we didn't enter the club. I guess some other time, when all of us can afford it better, we'll dump bottles at the bouncers.

Ah, well, the good part. I was in bambo9 for their 1st ever anniversary tonight. The first time I clubbed with Sharon today, errr, again, so called clubbed. As usual, the hot chique. lol. Trying to dance her way by herself, and you, Redd... Dot dot dot. Not only that I felt odd to dance with a good friend, but all the things that we've shared, your problems, mine, whatever and whatsoever that you can think of. Probably its about time to put aside my consience and conciousness. I would, go and dance with her, the next time I have the chance to. Then, there was this girl at the other table behind us. Damn. Now that I think cindians rocks baby! Her name is Michelle, so I guessed from her msn. Hmmmph. She was hot, open minded, friendly, nice, bla bla bla.... whatever you can think of that you want a CHIQUE to be.

For the very first time, I have chiques throwing ice over my head, then come to me and ask me if I'm okay. Well, strike the jackpot baby. I told her that I'm oaky, still awake. She says: ARE YOU SURE? LET ME HELP YOU. *grabs a bunch of ice from the ice container and rubs them on my face* . Damn. She asked again: ARE YOU STILL OKAY? DID I DO ANYTHING TO YOU? Wowowo, of course, I said no. Errr, this time I have coke with ice. On the face. Then she asked again: ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE OKAY? Yeah. She: ARE YOU WET? Errr... NOt really? Then I got a big piece of ice rubbed and poked into my mouth. Lol. Damn, where would you find a girl who would do such things? HEH. But its cool, she did talk abit of nonsense, and gave us her msn.

But well, the bad part is... I spent like 100 bucks for bacardi shots. Rapsberry konon. Tastes like fever medication. But oh well, the shot girls are persistent, and they are good at persuasion. Feels like Chen. Holy persuasion. Converts a creep to fight by your side. =.=

Veen's coming down tomorrow. I wonder what's gonna happen. Ahem, probably I wondered too much by myself. Now that I don't think anything's gonna happen. Damn, potong stim right. Then, I'm still all eager to meet her. Not to say that I really missed her, but yes, I do, at times. And alot of people do find it a little odd. Girls are complicated. Really complicated. I have no idea. Lets see how things are gonna swing tomorrow. Good luck to myself.

I should go to bed. Left with like 3 hours to sleep lol. Good night.

Emo, Club, and the end of hols.

Damn, it sure has been a pretty long night... Very very long night. Another night spent in club... I drank freaking alot tonight. Came outta the club tipsy, very tipsy. If any of you happen to realise, girls nowadays... They're getting wilder and hotter, but yet, some of them are just pure arrogant. Not as a way of showing off, but as a way of showing you the way out. Sad, right? But oh well, I'm sure that someday will come. But damn... I missed out on someone else. Huhu... Why do girls like Maison so much I wonder. C'mon ladies, the dance floor sucks... errr, for guys? But then still, when you have a company or scores of friends there, it doesn't really matter right.

Always, as people would say, a friend in deed is a friend in need. At times when I was drunk, which does not happen often, and I would say it has only happened twice or 3 times till today, since I set foot on earth, friends would always be there to cover for me, take care of me, and make sure that I reach home safely. I guess everyone should return such favours right. Boon got pretty drunk tonight lol. I don't really know why, but he seems to be troubled with his girlfriend's stuff. Dude, I hope you both will work out allright. But of course, you can't be getting away with this without a proper introduction of her to your good friend, and, hmmph... Introduce some of her friends too lol !

I just got home, and I didn't sleep the whole Saturday. There goes my holidays =/ Class's gonna start tomorrow and this sucks baby. Damn... No more free gaming days, no more clubbing on weekdays, and of course, about time to get healthy. Heh. I guess I'm gonna go for squash again tomorrow. With Mikee and gang. I do really enjoy those ball hitting session with them, her especially.

Veen's coming down on thursday, and she's just confirmed it yesterday night. But... She isn't coming down alone. Too bad for me I guess. She did kinda stirr up my emotions for that moment, but oh well... Those draft games got me running along again. Sorry mates, for my carelessness in the game. It was quite foolish of me not to realise such important things in the game. I should go to bed now... Its 2 pm =.=

Fellow ladies, clubs and friends.

Yeah. I'm back. Sitting on this lonely bed, watching Tv, listening to emo songs. Just came back from coco, and yet, there are lots of things that have been wondering in my head at this moment, and I'll try to write what I remember and what I can.

Okay, call me a bad friend. I'm really sorry Kyle, for not making it to the paintball session. I was feeling pretty bad this morning when I got up, and it got worse as soon as I stepped off the bed. The headache stroke me as if I had a stone piercing through my head. It was that bad. Sometimes, I really feel bad, for flying kites towards friends. It happens, you know, at times when I'm so lazy to move my bones, and at times when I'm really not feeling well. Can't help it, and I'm sorry if I did offend any of you guys, or ladies.

I practically did nothing much today, as it is another day of camping at the cyber cafe. Played a few games, and then I rushed home to get ready to club tonight. Cocobanana, the usual spot, lol. Apparently my classmates are still wondering that I'm gonna club tonight. Its friday night you know, how can you bear to stay home? I don't really understand. This is not meant against anyone specific, as I respect everyone's differential decision and persepctive.

As I entered the club, I noticed two girls dancing at the end of the dance floor. From the back, it did look like someone I knew, of course, someone from IMU, the girl who had brought me clubbing at the very first time. I shall not mention names. Thoughts about you ran through my mind as if a waterfall is rushing down the cliffs. Then I messaged her, asking her if the girl is who I've been thinking it was. But then, too bad, she told me that it isn't her, but it's a little too late.I did notice a few girl that was abit drunk at the club tonight. And one of them was her. She fell close to me, and I had to pick her up by her waist, and help her move her way down the dance floor to her table with her friend. Both of them was quite drunk, or I would rather say, freaking tipsy. I hope that they got home safely. And back to the other girl. I shall not mention names, as above. She calls me darling, again, says that I missed her too much. But well, who wouldn't miss such a hot chique. I don't really know, things between us have been quite complicated, and I guess its better to leave it this way, unless we can make an improvement to this.

I drove home, half tipsy. Fetched Kyle back, and got home safely. Or at least I think, and then I messaged Veen. To be honest to myself, I do miss her, in some ways. And knowing that she's coming down next week, I do hope that we can spend some time together, if condition and situation allows. I do wanna club with her again, as it has been quite some time since we danced with one another.

To know that Kyle's gonna ask the dentistry chiques out tomorrow, is a good thing. Now that I'm all excited to go clubbing again tomorrow. Even though I've heard alot about the chiques, but yet, the enthusiasm to meet them is flowing rapidly through my veins. Ah, yes, Josephine will also be down here tomorrow, and she's gonna camp over my place. Lets hope that I don't have to sleep on the floor lol. And I do hope that we'll spend some good time in each other's company tomorrow.

I should go to bed. Desperately needs my beauty sleep. Nitez darling.

Goodbye baby, Guy's Preferences

Arrrrr.... It hasn't been a good day. Okay, besides the fact that I had fun and such, but most importantly, my phone gave up on me. I was complaining about it yesterday, but today, he's gone. Definitely. Sorry and thanks, Veen, for all the trouble you had to go through to bank in that money to me so that I can get myself a new phone.

I did see Mikee again today, and she's abit frustrated about what happened yesterday, or rather, this morning. The lining ups and such. Gawd, even the dean came in and complained about Bpharm's kiasuness, but he did say that he was more worried about the student's safety, so I heard. I'm glad for you Mikee, that you did get what you wanted to do. And thanks alot for the cream too. Hope it'll help.

Talking about girls, and the types of girls we guys like. Its weird. Everyone's got a different taste and preferences. To me, girls... As long as she's nice, caring, outgoing, loving... And most of all, she should know her limits. I personally think, I'm not looking for a good girl, and I prefer those who're not-so-good. Hopefully I can find one who's in between lol. Yet again, today, friends did kinda scold me and ask me questions which I've failed to answer till now, till today. Months have passed, but why and how could I be that stupid to leave a girl who's that pretty and hot? Sometimes it really comes back to haunt me, but I guess what's gone is gone, what's over is over. Its about time to carry on, and of course, we shall not spoil things that are going in the better direction, I think.

Hmmph, I don' t think I'm gonna write alot tonight. I should go to bed soon... I've only got like 3 hours to sleep right now. Gotta wake up for my first ever shooting session. LoL. Okay, its not what you think, if you're reading this. I might be a little polluted, but its a paintball session, not whatever that's in your mind. All excited and fired up, but I'm not sure if I can pull it thru the day tomorrow.

Of determination and struggles.

I haven't really been to church for quite some time... The last time I came breeze thru the Lord, was last sunday night, during the dinner at Mr. and Mrs. Lam's house. And yet, I was talking about prayers and saying thanks to a friend of mine. Tonight I sit alone on this bed meant for two, listening to Christian Songs, blogging. And its 6.30 am in the morning. Gosh, what had happened to my life. I wonder, and I ponder upon myself. Filled with guilt and regerts of what I've done wrong, what I should've done, and what I shouldn't have done. But a man of regrets will never move forward and strive ahead. I vow to myself, never to look back, and to pick myself up everytime I fall. But it couldn't have happened, not without friends, not without family members, not without You, God. Eventhough many people argued about Your existance, athiests who don't believe in You, people who're confused by Your real words... Here I stand before You every night, asking for forgiveness from what I've done wrong, that I may be a free soul. And to thank you, Lord, for blessing me with lots of determination to pull myself through struggles. At times when I was down and I'm out, I would pray, and there is always light at the end of the dark tunnel.

To laugh or not to laugh, I'll leave it up to you. It's a serious matter. What has happened to people in this country? The latest epidemic plague has swarmed all the teenagers, even young adults. But, how would you really look at it? University students who que up as early as 1 am to get in line to receive numbers that will be given at 7.30 am? Are these people really determined to achieve something in life? Either or, their competitive nature has begun to ravage in their blood, like their hormones. What about the public perception on this university? I really have no idea, as I've never really been through anything like this. I guess its just part of my natural behaviour to be not-so-competitive-prone. Yet, parents and governments wonder, why on earth are suicide rates increasing. I guess I found the answer today. To all my friends who're really determined, I wish you ladies and gents, all the best and may you succeed. And to my friends who haven't been feeling well being pressured this way, I hope you'll take good care of yourself. Especially you, Mikee. You're different from alot of people I've met. Caring, cheerful, jovial... And you're always sincere, even though you can be abit kiddish at times when you come into contact with teddy bears.

I've been single for almost a month plus now. Do you not know, everytime I get a message from you, it sorta like reminds me of the times when I liked you, and I still do. The way you called me darling, the way you tell me that you miss me, the way you complain about things to me, it sorta make me feel that I'm not that bad a guy after all. Although I know that sometimes you are just flirting with me, I like those moments, and it did boost my self-esteem. But, things between us have been complicated. Pretty complicated. Hmmphhh... Now that I've read what I wrote, you sorta remind me of the past. You are quite similar to her, but yet, I think, you know the right buttons to push a relationship to the right path. Should things happen, I would let them take their course. Not that I won't put effort into it, I would, but I've gotta let things go their way to right? I would do my hardest, try my best, but whatever happens next, its not for me to decide.

Pfft, I officially did my first event of sports in like, 3 months?? I don't deny that I've been physically dormant for a quarter of the year, since I started serious gaming. Its all about the games, ways to beat your opponents, trainings to build your teamwork... But when I glanced back, it did look a little silly, yet I'm doing it still now. Trying my luck for this coming SMM Dota tourney. We played squash today, and as usual, I deproved. Played like shit, as compared to me back then. First was table tennis, now squash. Darn... I really think I should get back into these stuff and train myself. Ah, not to forget, I might start working out my lazy bones... Gym? LoL. Although I first thought it is not gonna work, but when I think again, a desperate soul would do anything to get fit :p.

And yes, although I have been telling myself that I wanna keep this blog for myself, I leaked out. Hah. Well, now my classmate knows that I blog, and gawdd.. She was so surprised that she failed to reply me on msn for like... I don't know. Ah yes, a person like me, who has been quite secretive of what my friends tell me, failed to keep secrets for myself. Too bad, I guess I'm weak at heart. When a girl asks me for a favour, or when they ask me for something, I seldom say no. Awww... I guess its good to a certain extent, but someday later, it may come back to harm me. I should be a little more careful with my words and decisions.

Damn... I guess I have to spend money again... Soon. My phone's screwed up. Arrrrr.... Must have been due to the damage it took while banging the floor this morning. It toggles itself as it wishes, on and off to his or her prevail. I wonder if he or she is trying to play tricks on me. LoL? Maybe I'm not getting enough sleep, hallucination.I should get going now that the sun is up. Nite darlings.

Of Sharing, and Caring.

It has been a good day that isn't that good after all... Sorry ladies, I was late for almost an hour, thanks to the tough match that I was having which I ended up losing... But oh well, it was a good fight. I was pretty afraid that any of you would ran out of patience waiting for me though. You know, ladies... They aren't that bad at being patient, but if you happen to strike the wrong string, the guitar strikes back at you.

Sometimes, when I see people who're stressed out, or they're very motivated towards their work, they kinda freak me out, or maybe, give me scares. They do initiate this... Self-concious in myself, that me, as I am, a procastinator. Last minute work, skipping classes, which I'm quite good at, and I use to take pride in these stuff. Oh well... I guess life isn't that hectic after all, or that's what I think. When I look back into my younger semesters, I find them pretty hard strive through. Tough, B-pharmers, it has been tough. And yet I wonder, how'd you people, manage to achieve a 4.0 GPA for these semesters? Kudos to you guys and girls, for trying so hard. Congratulations to those of you who made it, and condolences to those who died trying. I am, who I am, where I stand today. Although I may be different years before this, or years down the journey of life, I am happy with my achievements, and I'm glad that I've made it through all these hard moments.

Veen oh veen. You know, sometimes, you change my heart in a matter of seconds. It kinda upsets me that we had to end the relationship we had this way, but at this point, I think that we both are happy with what we have at the moment, with where we stand at this critical age of young adults. And with the fact that you're coming down soon in a few weeks time... I can't really imagine what's gonna happen, or whatever that is about to take place. I do hope that we will enjoy our times , together or not. All the late night chats, the times when you keep me awake so that I would accompany you and stop you from falling asleep... Arrr, it does take quite a toll on me and my conciousness. But oh well, be gentle baby, you don't wanna mess with a girl.

And I was at McD again. The 2nd time in this week. GG baby, to my slimming down plans. Haha... The hundreds of push-ups and sit-ups, gone in a night. Gracefully sacrificed for a double cheeseburger, with loads of coke, and the usual bunch of friends, gamers. All those stories that were shared, and why am I surprised that I have friends like you people lol.

Well, I had little of patience, when I was much younger. All the quarrels with mum, and such... Fights, exchange of words, now they all look and sound childish to me. About time to grow up and leave such things huh? Patience, I wouldn't say I have loads of them, but I haven't get angry at anyone for quite some time. I guess, the last time was the security guard at Vista C. But, is anger a sin? I don't really know. It sounds more like a devil's taunt to me.

Well, good night, for now. Dead tired.

Hold on, brother hold on.

The song kept playing in my head... "Here in my home". By Malaysians, for malaysians. But I do really wonder, how many of is in this country, feels so. How many of you, are true to this country... When things don't really go our way... When other people's benefit comes before your own.

Practically did nothing today. Pretty same for other days... Ee Ling, you really made me wonder... Why am I spending this holiday this way, when I could really be more productive. But... Oh well, I guess, Daniel = entertainment, and Daniel is who I am. Hmmph...

And yes, thank you Mr. and Mrs. Lam, for the wonderful dinner. You both have been great pharmacists that played an important part in my life... And a great thanks to my last minute date... Seesh, to be kept secret :p. She's been a good friend to me all this while, holding me when I'm falling, picking me up when I fell. She's always been there, and for that I sincerely thank you blob. The dinner was wonderful, alas, home-cooked meal since years of KL life.

Mum called me today... When I was having dinner at the pharmacist's place. Dad sold our house, so I guess we're moving pretty soon, as soon as the deal is completed. Awww, I don't really wanna move you know. I've had lots of good times in the house since I moved in in 2001. It has been many years, all those fishing trips, parties, sleepless nights... Drinking moments with dad. But well, people need to move on. Daddy haven't really been feeling well in the house lately, probably because of the noise and the daily hazzle going on around. Well, dad, you're getting older as days pass. You should take good care of your health.

Jo and Dinesh... LoL. If you both ever read this... Both of you seriously played suckily. But yeah, I enjoyed playing with you guys all these nights we spent in the cc... It had been fun, although there have been tough times, and for you girl, I hope you'll hold on to him, and as a good friend of both, from the bottom of my heart, I wish you two all the best.

Another Day Spent.

LoL. Okie, at the first place, I wouldn't even believe that I would be writing this. I was freaking tipsy yesterday night. So am I tonight.

I practically spent my whole day in Point Extreme again, trying to pawn some noobs... But yet, its just another wastage of time. I should be spending them on something else more beneficial, Ling advises. But yet, those lazy bones... They're still lazy. So... Too bad, time is being spent in Px again, on noobs.

Too bad you know, when what you have been wondering all night, didn't turn out as it was supposed to be. It was a major disappointment, to find out that the HOT CHIQUE yesterday, is a Thai national. I think, or at least my friends think so. I wonder if they're too tipsy to make their judgement, but I still think that S H E ' S H O T. But well, let bygones be bygones.

Things would've changed a little, for the better. Leen isn't angry at me anymore, I think. She says its up to me to decide whether she's angry or not. But... Being a guy, when a girl replies you, I think it sounds like forgiveness you know. I'm a guy who cannot live in guilt, FYI, for those who didn't know. Especially when a girl is angry at me.

Clubbed again tonight. Been spending a little to much. Those cash that I had for the electric bills, disappeared to the hands of the government. 100 bucks down the drain of the tank, for my darling. She's silky black, still looking good. Or at least I think so.

Recently, I got a little boost in my own self confidence. Now that I think I look N O T B A D... Hmmph... I used to be a little passive in club, but recently, there's a little bit of improvement. If you've really decided to find out, ask me about it. If only you're interested cause they may bore you to death. HAHA....

After all, things went smoothly, and today is a better day as compared to yesterday. Gl hf, I would say. Nitez baby.

Well, surprise?

Haha... You know, I never came across this kinda stuff... Starting a blog and such, but... Well, shit do happen, and most of you know that. I doubt anyone would be reading this... I just need somewhere to pour what's in my heart right now.

Too bad, for those of you who manage to find this out and read, I don't think I'll be updating it as much or as soon as I can. Circumstances applies.

Life hasn't been good to me lately, but that doesn't mean God isn't good. I do believe in this term; God is fair, the world is just, and such... Bla bla bla... I guess its just a few of these... Series of unfortunate event stuff pouring in.

Lemme start this off with some emo stories. I don't think you're gonna like it if you do happen to read it. Cynical as I am, sarcasm is a part of my life. But when it affects you directly, there's no way you can be sarcastic towards yourself. Sad, but satisfied. Emo? That's what I used to tell people, like you. Why are you down? I asked. Why are you feeling bad? Why are you sad? But then, not many people ask me back such questions. Then I started to question myself. How many are you are my true friends?

The fact is that, yeah, most of you are. Its just that not all of you are involved in my life. You're friends, not part of me. I do understand, and I personally thank all of you who listen to my rantings, my comments, my personal views and persepctives... Thank you friends... and family. '

I broke up... ON the Aprilfool day itself. Not a joke, but well, it sounds like one. Who would pick such days, but its the inevitable. Things got worse, they just didn't get outta hand, but they got wayyyyy outta hand. She was down, a week later, trying all sorts of things to get me crazy over her, which I shall not elaborate... It was good you know, those few nights. At least we get to spend some time together eventhough our relationship is screwed.

You talked to me, you talked into me. Things were in place, for a moment... And I thought it was a good thing to start anew... With you. But things didn't turn out to be as it is... You were down here, you were hot, you were sexy, you were seductive... You were everything that I could think of, but... Most of all, you haven't been a good partner. Not on bed, but yes, a sucky life-partner.

Things got outta hand way later. I stopped messaging you, girl, because I thought you would be sleeping during the day. You needed the rest, badly. Yet... You claimed that I was ignorant. Indeed I was. I had to admit. Then, things happen again, the way it should be.

Its the 12th of June, when my dad's 50th birthday was celebrated. I was there, yet I wasn't really there. I wanna thank my dad for lots of stuff... Dad's a cool guy. Freaking cool guy. He did play an important part in my teenager life... You know, if you did know... I was a bad son. Argued with my mum, always, most of the time... Threatened to run away from home and such, but daddy was always there, and he still is. He would ask me to come back, no matter where I am, and with that much of respect for him, I always do. I listened to his long lectures, where lectures are just lectures with no intention of getting angry or anger in his voice. He would calm me, listen to me, hear me... Everything, you would ever imagine, the perfect dad. Yet, I didn't really do much for his birthday, and here I am daddy, Happy 50th birthday. Eventhough its a week late or so. I love you dad.

Back to this girl, you know who, for those who know. For those who don't, don't assume. Ask and ye shall know. But, she's a nice girl, nice body, pretty, great attitude, a good way of carrying herself... As a friend. After we broke up, she did a couple of things, which I never found out, till I was being told, by her own will. Of course, I had the right to know, I think. Even though it was a little late, but I'm glad she did tell me after all.

Veen, I had lots of respect for you, as a girlfriend of mine, as a close friend of mine, and as a sister of mine. And I still do. Eventhough things did not turn out to be as before, but you're still someone to me, someone important in my life. I'm glad of what you did for me, what you did to me, everything, and yet there's nothing much I regretted of the things that had happened. I still have that much of respect for you, eventhough you're not the same person to me. Thank you, if I haven't been saying that to you before this, and just to let you know, all the things that you do or did and you're still doing, I do really appreciate it. Just that.... I don't really know how to voice it to you.

Yet tonight, I remained single. Not that I don't have anyone that I'm particularly interested in, but... I think they're just not the right person. There's one, and we'll see how things play thier part, with me and her playing a great role in it. Lets just hope things will turn out good. If it doesn't, its just another chapter in life. Move on darling, I tell myself. Here I stand.

Went on a clubbing spree, since after I let things go. I clubbed for 3 nights a row. Wow. I tell myself. Smoked the shit outta myself, until I can't even breath properly. I was gasping for air on the 3rd day, and yet, I went again that night. With the hangover kicking in, I couldn't be really bothered.

Spent my whole holidays, clubbing, drinking, dota'ing, and whatever you can think of. I did have a good time in Genting with a few juniors, particularly Steph, Amy and Mikee. Mikee has been nice. A good friend, and probably, she'll be a good wife to some. I think, if you can tolerate her advicing skills. She's been nice, advicing me not to smoke, although proclaiming that I'm cheating on my sisters at home by smoking behind them isn't such a good thing... Haha... Mikee, thanks alot. Steph, thanks alot to you too. You've always been there most of the time I needed someone to talk to. Thanks for listening to my rantings, and alot more of those nonsense. Haha...

Tonight... After clubbing for so long... I met this hot chique. She was tempting, seductive, hot, all you can think about... But yetttttt... She was attached. I didn't know, asking a chique for a drink could be this interesting... It has never been, at least from what I've gone thru. Maybe I wasn't screwed up enough to do anything more, but this girl... She was different. So different. Too bad, I didn't manage to get her contacts, or dance with her or anything...

Some of you may think, this is what kids or growing teenagers do, but well. I guess everyone needs something to do right? Hah. Lets just hope that I'll see her soon, and I'll be able to get to know her. Damn.

I did screw up abit of stuff today, and I hope she isn't angry anymore. I do admit that I wasn't being cautious or sensitive enough. And of course, she's a girl. What was I thinking? =.= I am at fault. And, Leen, if you're reading this someday later, I hope that I would be forgiven for doing such inconsiderate things.

After all, it has been a not so good day, and also a good day. I'm indecisive, as usual. Thanks, to those who I did not thank you for being a good friend and pal, and thanks again, to those that know, I do appreciate them, alot. Well, with this, I end my FIRST BLOGGING POST... LoL.